A Step-by-Step Overview of Divorce Mediation, Part 1: What to Expect

Divorce can be a stressful, costly, and lengthy process. If you’re considering parting ways with your spouse, it’s important to understand that litigation isn’t the only option — mediation is an alternative that can allow you to divorce cost-effectively, peacefully, and amicably. However, you might be wondering what to expect in divorce mediation. In Part 1 of this blog series, we will discuss what happens during the divorce mediation process and how to decide if mediation would be a good option for you.

Step 1: The Mediator Explains the Divorce Mediation Process

While every mediator handles their sessions differently, the first step typically involves paperwork and an intake of the parties. Otherwise, you may have already received documents to sign in advance and have reviewed them with your attorney prior to meeting with the mediator. After you and your spouse review the mediation agreement and agree to the terms and fee, the mediation process can begin.

During the first mediation session, the mediator will explain what to expect in divorce mediation and may present an agenda. They will give an overview of the process. You and your spouse will introduce yourselves and provide the mediator with background information about yourselves and your case.

Step 2: The Mediator Gathers Information and Documentation

For the divorce mediation process to be successful, the mediator and spouses must have a clear picture of the facts in the case and an ability to negotiate the issues. A mediator cannot give you legal advice, but they can explain the law from a neutral standpoint so you can make an informed decision. The mediator will gather information about what issues you and your spouse may agree upon — and what topics must be discussed during mediation.

Some of the issues that may need to be addressed in the mediation process for divorce can include:

• Property, asset, and debt division
• Spousal support
• Child support
• Child custody matters

Depending on the issues that must be worked out, the mediator might request various documents, or request that documents be exchanged. While the mediator does not rule on evidence like a judge would, it can be helpful to have your mediator review things like bank statements, paystubs, school schedules, and other documentation pertaining to the issues that need to be resolved in the case.

Step 3: The Mediator Will Assist the Parties with Identifying Issues in the Case

Another stage to expect in the mediation process for divorce includes the framing stage. This is where a mediator helps each spouse outline their needs and interests and spouses will get the opportunity to communicate their concerns with one another. The mediator will guide the discussion to facilitate communication about your objectives, individual concerns, and priorities. Identifying the interests of each party helps to frame the primary goal of mediation — entering into a settlement that both spouses can accept.

You and your spouse may have shared objectives, especially when it comes to matters like child custody. A common interest can make achieving a settlement much easier. Unfortunately, it isn’t always possible to arrive at terms that fully satisfy the goals of both spouses. In such cases, compromise is necessary. Even if you and your spouse are contentious about a particular matter, a skillful mediator will be able to help you reach a mutually acceptable solution.

Step 4: Negotiations

Depending on the issues that must be resolved, only one mediation session may be needed. But usually, a few sessions are necessary to settle a divorce case. Once the issues have been framed and articulated clearly, the negotiation process will begin. Negotiations (within the context of mediation) usually begin with exploring the possible ways each issue can be settled in divorce. With the assistance of the mediator, you and your spouse can brainstorm options until you compile a list of potential solutions — this almost always involves making concessions.

Divorce mediation is flexible. Unlike with the court process, when you participate in the mediation process for divorce, you and your spouse will be able to reach creative solutions that work for the whole family. Significantly, you and your spouse are in control of the outcome with mediation, rather than the alternative - to allow a judge (who does not know you, or your family) to decide the issues in your case. Mediation can allow you and your spouse to enter into creative arrangements that meet your unique circumstances, which go beyond the options available in traditional litigation.

Step 5: Drafting a Settlement Agreement

Once an agreement has been reached during the divorce mediation process, a written settlement agreement will be drafted. This agreement will address all the issues that must be decided in order to divorce and memorialize the resolutions you and your spouse reached for each issue. You and your spouse should review the document thoroughly with your respective attorneys before signing it.

Importantly, signing the settlement agreement does not finalize your divorce. The signed agreement will still need to be submitted to the court and signed by a judge to become part of the divorce decree. Once this has occurred, the agreement becomes a binding order which must be adhered to. If you or your spouse fail to follow the order, the other can bring an enforcement action in court.

Contact an Experienced Maryland Divorce Attorney

For many couples who choose to part ways, the mediation process for divorce can offer many advantages, including tailoring a resolution that fits the needs of their family and putting the best interests of their children first. At the Law Office of Shelly M. Ingram, we provide dedicated counsel to help you navigate the complexities of divorce, no matter what process is right for your case. Trained in mediation, collaborative divorce, and traditional divorce, we are committed to working closely with you to achieve a solution that will accomplish your goals. To schedule a confidential consultation with an experienced Maryland divorce attorney, call us at (301) 658-7354 or contact us online.